Losing the Village: Grief Theories and the Ways Grief Will Forever Never Be Understood.
For 10 years I was a devoted member of a spiritual village. It’s something that is considered kind of a cult by many people and after I trained to be a teacher, I started to believe it too. I left shortly after that feeling grief and loss, but also freedom. Freedom from the strict rules. Freedom from the constant yoga and meditation (twice a day including at 4 in the morning on Wednesdays and Saturdays). I was obsessed and super invested. Hence the grief of my leaving.
I just got an email from them (I’m still on their email list) stating that their space has been sold. It will likely still remain similar to what it was but certainly not the same and perhaps not a spiritual hub where Sikh Kundalini thrived.
You would think that with my experience there and the way I left abruptly due to exhaustion and the feeling I was a part of a cult that I would not feel much at this moment learning that information. But I am indeed feeling that same grief again. I actually feel like crying though I am choking it back.
Grief can happen at any time at any moment for any thing, person, place, loss of identity, or a myriad of reasons. And I am feeling it unexpectedly for a place that actually took advantage of me. I worked there 20 hours a week for free for years. They called it Seva, or selfless service. And I bought into it…
